Festivals drive me crazy,
I now hate to see celebrations around,
The sounds of happiness and laughter,
Pinches me deep within.
It is not that, I envy you,
It is not that, I hate you,
But, I do hate my destiny,
For snatching these happy moments from me.
I am unable to respond,
When someone wishes me happiness,
I may appear rude,
Because the emotions within don’t let me speak.
Wishes on festivals and occasions,
Do more bad than good,
It seems as if you are teasing my heart,
Because, my life is now dark.
I know, it’s not your intention,
To make me feel hurt,
But, even if it’s unintentional,
It do makes my wound deeper.
My joyous moments and happy days,
Will never be back again,
Life has played a cruel game,
Burning my happiness in flames.
You may celebrate birthdays and anniversaries,
But, for me all days are similar.
You may celebrate New Year,
But, for me old one was better.
You may celebrate festival of colors,
But, my life is now black forever.
You may celebrate festival of lights,
But, my life is dark forever.
I can never ever participate,
In any celebration whole heartedly,
I may be present physically,
But never emotionally.
I may appear to be smiling,
But my soul will be crying,
Intensifying the pain within,
Making it hard to grin.
I may hold my tears,
Falling from my eyes
But, I can’t stop tearing apart,
Of my heart inside.
Whenever I face this festive atmosphere,
I am crushed into pieces once again,
I feel like running away from there,
And sit in a dark confined corner.
Away from those painful moments,
Away from those happy events.
In my own dark world,
With no space for celebrations.