REALITY IS – – ??

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What is Reality?

Reality is what happened in Nepal Earthquakes..
Reality is what happened in Kedarnath Floods..
Reality is what happened in Japan Tsunami..
Reality is what happened in Mount Everest Avalanche..

Reality is the uncertainty of the next moment.

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We are all aware of this reality, this truth. Still, we spend time, planning, analyzing, calculating. Still, we develop feelings of jealousy, disappointment, dislike, anger, dissatisfaction. Still, we keep ourselves busy comparing, complaining and cribbing.
What for? For the future? For the moment which you are not sure to see. For tomorrow, which may never come?

Life is unpredictable.
Live in present.
Enjoy the present.
Live every moment as if it’s your last.
Be Kind and Helpful.

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We all need to learn from these natural disasters. We shall all act on these alarms before it’s too late. It’s our interference with nature, which leads up to such disasters. We need to respect nature.
In this pathetic situation of Nepal Disaster, I urge everyone who is safe to pray for the well being of victims.

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O GOD! PLEASE BE KIND!!
Please give peace, courage and strength to the victims and bereaved families,
Please enlighten a ray of hope and show them a path,
Please help them in moving forward,
Please rescue them all from this disaster.
O GOD! PLEASE BE KIND!!
O GOD! PLEASE BE KIND!!

Helpless – Powerless – Clueless – Directionless ?

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How many of you have come across above words in your life?
How many of you have encountered these feelings?
What to do when we have such feeling?
How to tackle these & try to move forward?
How to accept the hard truth that nothing is in our hands?

There are so many times when we ourselves or our near & dear ones get engulfed in such a situation where there is no way out. We get that urge of thinking it like a nightmare, thinking that it’s not true; it’s just some imagination / illusion. We keep consoling our mind by a simple explanation that everything in this world happens by GOD’s will & we shall accept it. But, at the same time our heart keeps feeling that it’s not true.

It becomes such a helpless situation, you don’t find words to console the affected person, you can see/ feel the pain but you are unable to cure it. It is really a difficult challenge when you want to help but you can’t. All the strength, trust, belief & faith shatters away & you feel weak & powerless. You keep thinking if you could rewind the whole situation & make everything settle down smoothly, but you can’t. You are clueless on how to tackle the situation & you feel like you have lost your capability of sensing, judging, deciding & moving ahead. You feel like running away….running away from your problems, your worries, your fears, but the fact is:

“YOU CAN NEVER RUN AWAY FROM YOURSELF.” Continue reading

BLACK OUT !!

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Life is made up of varied experiences, some pleasant, some unpleasant and some are just a part of normal routine. We say at times, to forget the past, not to expect from future & live in our present. On the contrary, we also say we should learn from past experiences, we should do our future planning & live our present building a strong foundation for our future.

Life never comes with a predefined set of correct & incorrect rules. Circumstances & experiences build different energy levels around us & our actions are just carried away by these energies. We all ride on high & low waves, on positive & negative energies, on good & bad mood swings, on pleasant & unpleasant feelings, on relevant & irrelevant actions & this is how our life moves – sometimes accelerating, sometimes retarding.

But, the most troublesome part is when it seems to come to a HALT. When you just don’t see the way, when you are unable to decide where to move & when you feel trapped in a black box. Mind goes blank & you don’t know what next?

We leave all on GOD & on destiny & just keep waiting for what’s going to happen next.
It’s true that, this world is ruled by Almighty GOD & we shall accept that all happens with GOD’s wish. Also, it’s good if you stop waiting for results & just leave all on GOD. But, it’s not good if you don’t take any actions also.

What’s the way out when you are so engulfed by circumstances around you, that your mind looses sense of direction, power of thinking, judging, deciding & strength of accepting the reality?
A complete “BLACK OUT” situation…!!

Can anyone throw light on this & guide how to come out of this Blackout?

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Emotional PUPPETS

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We all must have heard or seen “Puppet show” sometime in our lives. Puppets- Hand made dolls with strings attached to them. Humans catch hold of these strings & make them move as per their wish enabling to act a drama or dance. They just move as per their instructor’s direction.

Now, have you ever thought what would happen that if these puppets have emotions also?

If not, just give a thought to Who Are You?

Yes, we Humans are “Emotional Puppets”.

All our strings are in hands of “GOD” & though we think we have mind, we have heart, we can make decisions based on logics & feelings, but the fact is all that is going to happen is already destined by GOD. We just have to accept GOD’s will.

My only question to GOD is, when HE is to everything as per HIS wish, when HE has to treat us just like puppets, when our lives are just a play/drama for him, why he gave us emotions, why he gave us feelings?

Why we feel attached & detached, why we feel happy & sad, why we feel the pleasure & why we feel the pain?

The Law of Differential

Here, I want to talk about the “difference” in value of some variable in a particular closed system & its significance with respect to “tolerable” or “sustainable” limit of that particular system.

Differential pressure, Differential temperature, Differential voltage —-

Hey, are we talking about Physics here?
Absolutely NOT! Please don’t leave this page.
But, yes my interpretation is based on Physics.

Let’s take an example of a closed tank. Consider it being filled with some fluid at some pressure. Outside pressure will be atmospheric pressure & therefore the walls of tank will experience a differential pressure across them. When inside pressure reaches a particular threshold value (that depends on wall material, thickness & strength), then any increase in pressure beyond that may lead to rupture or explosion of tank walls. To prevent it, we use systems to vent our excess pressure as soon as we reach close to overpressure limit.

Now, if we take human body as “Tank” & our Emotions & Feelings as “Pressure”, we will get the answer of why we feel uncomfortable when we don’t express exactly what we feel? At times we hold our actual emotions & feelings deep inside us. Sometimes, we are so lost in grief that we don’t even feel like sharing them with the outer world & there are several reasons for it:

We don’t want them to get troubled by our troubles.
We don’t want to listen to their advice & sympathy.
We don’t want them to know we are so week.
We don’t want to be a burden searching for a shoulder to cry on.
We feel guilty & hopeless and want to get cut-off from outer world.

So, we end up holding all our pain & grief deep within us. Not talking, not communicating & not sharing with anyone around us. We may try to behave & act normally but our sub-conscious never gets affected by this illusion. There are times when it not just the other world from which we try to hide our feelings. We hide it from ourselves also. We try to be strong & keep manipulating our mind keeping ourselves busy & normal. This is really needed to come out of grief. But, when we sleep & as we wake up, our sub-conscious mind is more dominant & we feel the pain, depression & discomfort.

We need to be strong, we need to console emotions in our heart by giving logic from our mind, we need to keep ourselves busy, we need to adopt normal routine & we need to try hard to get out of our grief.
But, we should also keep in mind how strong we are? How much we can really hold? We need to find sometime for talking to ourselves & our near & dear ones. Healing from grief is a gradual process & adopting short-cuts can turn out to be risky.

So, it’s the task of close friends & family members to closely monitor the grieving person & let him/her vent out the actual feelings before reaching a threshold limit of their tolerance level.
Every human is different & every grief is different so there cannot be any specific guideline on healing time & ways to heal. Coping up with grief is a unique process for every individual & no one can guide you what you should do & what you shouldn’t.

You yourself will have to find a way for your healing. You have to introspect yourself with honesty. Too much differential between your sub-conscious & conscious mind is not good for your physical & mental health. As a consequence, you may have sleepless nights; lose your appetite, headache etc. degrading your health further.

You will surely have people around you who care for you. Never hesitate to take their support & express what you feel.

The only key to come out of depression is –
“TO EXPRESS AND NOT TO SUPPRESS”.
“TO ACCEPT AND NOT TO FORGET”.
“TO FACE THE REALITY AND NOT TO RUN”.
“TO TALK AND NOT TO STAY SILENT”.

No one knows you better than you yourself. You are your doctor & you have to decide your healing process. Please make sure that there is not much of difference between your sub-conscious & conscious mind. Please make sure that you are not lying to yourself.

Remember you are very important for your family & friends.

PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

GOD also helps those who help themselves.

Hope that GOD will be kind you.

Note: It would be helpful if readers can give their suggestions on ways to cope up with grief.

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What to Do… What to Say…?

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This world constitutes of different energy levels, of varying frequencies, containing waves of both positivity & negativity. There is not a single instant when everyone will get tuned on either positive or negative wave. With this being the reality, it becomes so difficult to react in a particular situation.

I cannot be happy when people around me are not.
I cannot be happy when I am in trouble myself.

Some people say this is the result of being over-sensitive. One shall think practically. But, there are situations where being practical seems equivalent to being insensitive. It becomes even more difficult when the whole world is in festive mood, with the spirit of celebration & enjoyment and you or your closed ones are too disappointed to be a part of all this. We cannot say “No” to group celebrations on events like New Year (which is celebrated around the globe irrespective of community & religion). But, what worries me is how to prevent hurting someone who does not want to be a part of it. One who is in grief or depression and wants to be away from such gatherings. Isn’t it our social responsibility to give a comfort zone to those who really need it that time? But, the crowd often gets involved in pomp & show ignoring & leaving these depressed people alone. Close family members & friends are always a help but one can’t help facing celebrating mood of offices, markets & everywhere. They may land up getting even more depressed or irritated & this is the worst thing to happen.

I know it’s a weird question & a weird suggestion but can’t we change our ways of celebrating. After all celebration is not just eating, drinking, dancing & enjoying. It is about bringing happiness, smile, satisfaction or comfort in yours & others life.

Instead of distributing chocolates & candies, why don’t we just give food to the hungry?
Instead of putting glittering decorations, why don’t we just put some motivating slogans?
Instead of wishing happiness, why don’t we just wish healthiness?

Wishing happiness may seem irritating to people who are too depressed & feel like being disassociated with happiness forever. Wishing them to be happy may pinch / hurt them even more. So, this New Year please look around you and make sure you are not leaving anyone alone making them feel awkward. Hang out with someone who needs you most.

There is a saying, “Sukh Ke Sab Saathi Dukh Mein Na Koi”
i.e., you will see all around you in your good times but you may see yourself left alone during bad times.

It is not that we are all hard hearted or our fun & enjoyment is more important always. We are just unable to decide how to react, how to comfort those depressed people around us? Do they really want us around or do they want to be alone?

I don’t know what to do & what to say?

I will just pray GOD to keep everyone Healthy, Comfortable & in Peace.
O GOD, Please be KIND and give your Blessings to all….!!

WAIT…Wait…wait…!!

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WAIT… WAIT… WAIT…!!

“Oh GOD..!! I am fed up of waiting now. How long I need to wait?

Are you listening to me?

Why am I supposed to wait so long?

Why can’t things happen fast, on time & the way I want?”

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Waiting – I think no one on this earth has escaped this experience of waiting. There are so many forms of waiting & so many ways of reacting to these.

The word gains significance w.r.t. time frame allotted by us. It can be based on how long it takes or how fast we want it to happen.

Waiting for few things is just natural & obvious. For instance, waiting for rain, waiting for spring, waiting for day, waiting for night or waiting for weekend. This is self created wait, just because we are longing to see the change for a particular reason. These are all pre-defined things no matter how impatiently we wait & these will happen for sure no matter we want to see that change or not. I would term this category as “ILLOGICAL WAIT”.

Then comes, routine life waiting. This one is based on punctuality, crowd, and unavoidable resistances. Waiting for bus/train, waiting in a queue, waiting for someone. This is completely unavoidable most of the times and is the most irritating one. You rarely know how long you need to wait. Some people adjust themselves to these and try to handle the situation calmly while others keep cursing the situation & the system. These are all momentary waits that distracts/ disturbs us for a while but end up soon. I would term this category as “IRRITATING WAIT”.

And then comes, the most difficult category that is totally based on our desires and expectations. This form of waiting is undefined, unpredictable, without any boundaries / time frame. At times, it relies just on imagination & belief and at times it is based on realistic goals. How well we can cope with these actually defines how patient and adaptable we are to the current situation. At times, we have the illusion of getting nearer to our target & then we realize, it’s still the same distance away.

We either keep moving with belief, with courage, with patience. I would term this category as “REASONABLE WAIT”,

Or, we get panicked, irritated, frustrated & just give up. I would term this category as “FRUSTATING WAIT”.

It’s necessary to set some goals & targets to keep yourself moving & growing. It’s inevitable to have desires & expectations. To achieve these we obviously, make some plan, do some efforts & eagerly start waiting for results. Sometimes, things flow the way we want but not always. This is where we need to understand the role of GOD, our destiny & our fate.

“KARMA KARO FAL KI ICCHA MAT KARO” – Bhagwad Gita

“Do the actions but don’t have desire for fruitful results.”

Leave those to the will of GOD, and keep moving enjoying your present.

Always remember, if you keep worrying for the future you may end up ruining your present. Learn to live the present and plan the future but never get so busy planning it that you forget living your present.

WHAT IS YET TO COME IS ALWAYS A MYSTERY,

IT’S ONLY THE PRESENT THAT IS REALITY,

LIVE IT… ENJOY IT…!! 

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