WRITER’S BLOCK

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Have you ever experienced Writer’s Block? Probably, I will hear lot of “YES” response for this. Well, who can understand this better than a writer himself/herself?

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“WRITING”- it is more of a passion than a profession. You can never compare it with a 9 to 5 office job. Be it blogging, article writing, content writing or book writing – nothing can be easily defined in a boundary of time and deadlines. Ideas start pouring in our brain all of a sudden, our creativity energizes and our pen gears up with a wonderful pace. It continues and we enjoy the journey. But, sometimes the journey comes to an unexpected “HALT”. Exactly in a same manner as your speeding car comes to a halt due to puncture or breakdown. And worst case is you don’t have a mechanic to set you back on journey. Most of the times, you keep struggling trying to find out, why there is a sudden black-out?

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Where are all your ideas and thoughts? The more you think, the worse it gets. Writing is not something that can be done forcefully. It moves on at its own pace, at its own time, in its own way. And this changes as seasons change. There is a time when all circumstances are in your favor. But, then suddenly you may notice a change. Time changes abruptly, blocking all your writing skills – A WRITER’S BLOCK. It is really disappointing and depressing at times. Especially, when it continues for a longer duration. For someone who loves writing, this “block” is equivalent to starvation. It may sound funny to those who do not write. I hope my writer friends here, will surely understand the concern. You start feeling useless all of a sudden. You do your best efforts to keep yourself back on track – changing surroundings, changing topics, changing writing patterns, reading , interacting and what not.

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This is seriously awful experience and scary too. This is what I am facing for quite a long time and was worried about. However, as I searched more on it, I got to know it’s not just “ME”. Almost everyone faces this at some point of time. People adopt different ways to deal with it and this is what I learnt from them. Do not “RUN” from it, instead learn to “OVERCOME” it. With more than 10 half-written topics, I was totally confused. I start every topic, with a new zeal & then I see its not taking a proper shape. I give up, take a break, relax and start afresh on a new topic. Months have passed with this exercise, and it’s driving me crazy now. There is nothing worse than loosing all hope. So, today again I stood up, to fight against my “Block”. “YES” – nothing is impossible, nothing is permanent & nothing is difficult.

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I have to get away of my fears, I have to get away of my “WRITER’S BLOCK”.

So, before starting my half-left topics, I felt why not, I shall start with my fear first. I am here writing about this “WRITER’S BLOCK” and I would love to have your experiences, your guidance, and your ways of dealing with it.

It’s always easy to walk on a smooth road,

Challenge is to walk on a rocky road.

It’s always easy to drive a perfect car

Challenge is to fix an unfit car for driving.

It’s always easy to enjoy autumn season,

Challenge is to enjoy the chills & the burns too.

It’s always easy to do your best in favorable circumstances,

Challenge is to do your best in unfavorable times too.

It’s always easy to run away from difficulties,

Challenge is to stand strong & face them.

It’s always easy to climb up to peak.

Challenge is to stay there without falling.

It’s always easy to welcome success,

Challenge is to welcome failures

And be confident that

Beyond them lies your success.

And the biggest challenge is,

-“TO TAKE THE CHALLENGE”

Today, I am taking my Writer’s Block as a challenge, and I am confident that I will be able to overcome it with my faith, confidence, determination and will power.

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REASONING – “THE REASONS”

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REASONING – A word with which all of are familiar, a word with which we deal in our day to day life.

We are always involved in reasoning for something or other, be it what to eat, what to wear, where to go, what to do, what to buy, what to say & the list goes on.

Today I would like to focus on the reasoning for “REASONS”.

REASON – “An explanation, justification, logical thinking & understanding for an action or event.”

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Every rational thinker will always apply reason to & for everything. In fact, we all adopt rational approach for most of the things in our lives. But the question arises- Why & How these reasons impact our decisions, how they guide us on what to do and what not to do?

Are reasons just a medium/ path to reach our pre-defined / desired destination? Or they serve as guide which tells us which path to follow?

Reasoning is actually helping us in taking decisions & in attaining our goals, our targets, our focal points. It is these goals which lead us to land up in the process of reasoning.

For instance, when you decide to become an engineer, you have a goal in front of you & to achieve this goal you find a reason to pursue a degree in engineering.

When you decide to have lunch, you have the desire to eat (may be for hunger, may be for your taste buds) & then you find a reason to decide what to eat?

David Hume’s quote is the best fit here:

“REASONS IS, AND OUGHT ONLY TO BE THE SLAVE OF THE PASSIONS, AND CAN NEVER PRETEND TO ANY OTHER OFFICE THAN TO SERVE AND OBEY THEM.”

So, it’s our desires/ passions that gives us a destination & thereafter, we start finding reasons to reach that. These reasons give shape to our actions.

For fulfilling our wishes / desires & reaching our goals we start questioning ourselves? We start analyzing, why, where, what, how & when? With answer to every question, we start getting reasons & paths & we start deciding our action plan.

Leaving apart, the impulsive / sensory reflexes, where our body responds much faster than we think, all other actions are guided by some reasoning behind them.

There is always some logic, some justification, and some explanation for what we do.

But, everyone has different reasons for same circumstances. All of us have different priorities, preferences & tastes. So, even when we feel that we are thinking & analyzing with our best ability, it does not mean that we are always reaching the best or correct judgment. Every action has reasoning but every reason does not reach the same conclusion. This is what makes this world so complex & diversified. Even when we talk on some general issues, where we want to have a universal answer, we are unable to reach a well agreed conclusion. Every individual has a unique way thinking, a different perception & viewpoint. We all do reasoning, but we reach the conclusion that appeals us the most.

We choose the path that seems most comfortable to us i.e., we act in a way which helps us in driving us towards our desires.

As the reasons are not a result of honest & logical understanding but in fact the slave of our own desires, we all tend to behave differently.

So, in a nutshell we can conclude, it is not the logic, it is not the circumstances, it is not the right or wrong concept, it is actually the “REASONS” which tell us what we ought to do? And, these “REASONS” show us the way as per our “DESIRES”. So, we ought to do what we like, we ought to do what we want , we ought to do what we feel comfortable, we ought to do what we enjoy, but for all these questions we find an explanation in the form of “REASONS”, we justify each & everything with a rational approach & thereafter act accordingly.

“REASONS TELL US HOW TO GET WHAT WE WANT”.

And what we want is told to us by our feelings/ desires.

Reasons help us in reaching an agreement to behave / act in a particular manner.

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But, at times we must have heard of “Irrational” behavior also. Although we say that reason is a way of rational thinking, but in my view “irrational” responses are also a result of reasons. Yes, at times we have some desire but we are unable to find a proper logic or explanation to fulfill it. Those are the times when we tend to think that everything does not need a reason & we move ahead to fulfill our desire. But, actually here also we are giving a reason, that “everything does not need a reason”.

So, this is the power of reason.

And this clarifies the strong relationship of reasons & actions.

Every move, every decision, and every action – everything is told to us by “REASONS”.

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Understanding “MISUNDERSTANDINGS”

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MISUNDERSTANDING – Root cause of several conflicts, disputes, disassociations & break-ups.

It is human tendency to judge people based on their actions. We observe, judge & make some opinions about everyone surrounding us. In the process we sometimes end up with a wrong interpretation also. We shall remember that neither we nor our observations are always perfect. At times what we see is not what is behind. There may be different circumstances and reasons for a person to behave in a particular manner. What matters are the intentions.

The only way to tackle such misunderstandings is to talk, to openly explain your confusions & ask for clarifications. But, some people become so egoistic, so self obsessed, so angry or so confident that they prefer ending up the things instead of moving forward & resolving.

Before framing any such opinion, one shall listen to instincts, one shall evaluate the past records, one shall always give a second thought, one shall always analyze how trustworthy & faithful the other person was? No one can change in a day.

It’s not the person or intentions that tend to change with time its only “circumstances”.

So, if a misunderstanding is cropping in between, move forward and evaluate the circumstances in between. Focus on “what” has changed and not on “who” has changed. It’s better to cut the roots of such instances before they become too firm and you end up building a big boundary line on its foundation. Few relationships are too precious; don’t just let them fade away for mere misunderstanding.

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But, again there is a word of caution. There are two faces of every coin. When I say we can be wrong at times, we can be wrong at any phase. It may also happen that the one who we trust was never worth trusting. It may happen that when something objectionable & alarming happened we ignored it thinking it’s just a misunderstanding. It may also happen that when you approached for clarifications you were misguided. There are people with dual faces, they look sweet and they attack you from back. One needs to be alert with such people. In fact, sometimes such experiences make us see everyone around us with doubt & suspicion.

With all this said, I would like to conclude that-

Listen to your mind..

Listen to your heart..

Listen to your instincts,

Watch the actions..

Frame the observations..

Do the analysis,

Try to find out..

If it’s the person..

Or the circumstances,

If it’s a correct interpretation..

Or misunderstanding,

Track the past records..

But, be alert if such instances repeat,

Don’t just ignore..

Don’t over-react,

Be balanced..

Be Calm..

Be patient,

And just move forward,

With what pleases you the most.

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Chasing your “DREAMS”

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“IF YOU CAN DREAM IT, YOU CAN DO IT”.

Dreams – All of us have dreams. Almost all humans, all age groups have some sort of dreams.

They can be realistic, non-realistic, personal, professional, for you, for your family & friends, short term, long term & the list goes on.

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So, what is you dream? And, what are you doing to make it come true?

Well, it is always said that:

“FOR DREAMS TO COME TRUE, THE FIRST THING YOU HAVE TO DO IS WAKE UP.”

Ofcourse, everyone try to put in the best effort to make the dream come true. The more passionate you are about your dream , the more dedication & effort you show to achieve it, to make it happen. But, everything is not in our control.

Sometimes, our destiny puts such circumstances in front of us that however hard we try, we are not able to make our dream come true. We have to let it go and compromise on something else.

Most effective examples of above case are seen in case of professional dreams. There are cases where kids are forced to choose / study the stream that their parents want them to. They are supposed to forbid their dream & choose the other path. It is not always family pressure, there are other circumstances also like not getting through the entrance exams, financial limitations etc. which forces the student to opt for some other course.

Now, the challenge is how well you compromise on the situation and fit yourself in alternate career.

How to cope up with the situation when you failed to chase your dream?

When you get your dream job, it’s your interest & passion that drives the work out of you and make you excel. You enjoy your work and put in your best.

But, when you need to settle down on some other career, work load seems to be a pressure to you. Even when you try, it becomes very difficult to understand and go to the core depth of subject. Your attitude of working is not accompanied with the sense of responsibility & accomplishment but with the attitude of working just for the sake of working. As a result, you are not able to give the best of your performance and in long run, it starts hindering your growth making you frustrated & dissatisfied.

It’s always best to chase your dreams & get what you desire. But, if not one shall also learn to get the best out of what they got. Always be positive in what you do & be strong enough to face the realities. Don’t keep on getting frustrated for what you have not got. Instead, try to make what you have got worthy by giving your dedication in that. And, who knows, if you try, you my probably start enjoying this new area & excel in that.

So, friends

“ALWAYS RESPECT ALL THAT COMES TO YOU,

IT’S A BLESSING OF GOD,

YOU MAY NOT LIKE IT,

BUT YOU CAN TRY TO ENJOY IT…!!!!”

“IT DOES NOT DO TO DWELL ON DREAMS AND FORGET TO LIVE.” 

― J.K. RowlingHarry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone

MIRACLES…

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Do you believe in Miracles?

Do Miracles really happen?

What exactly are Miracles?

Do Miracles happen only by GOD’s grace?

Are Miracles really miracles or they are just illusions?

Is it a “Miracle” if something unexpected but positive happens?

Is it a “Miracle” if we get something that we wanted but it seemed difficult to achieve?

Is it just a coincidence which we sometimes term as Miracle?

Probably those who have ever experienced miracle will have answers to above questions.

We are at times so hopeful for the things we want & things which are almost impossible to get that we start assuming a miracle will happen one day and our desires, our dreams will turn into reality. Though its good to be hopeful & optimistic but to some extent only. We cannot just assume that come what may…a Miracle will occur and all our wishes will be fulfilled.

To turn any dream into reality we need to put in our efforts. To get desired results we need to perform our actions. So, what I believe is that: “Most of the times, Miracles also happen if we want them to happen. .if we let them happen.” We just can’t sit, wait & watch for a miracle to happen. One must not depend on them & wait for them.

But yes, “MIRACLES DO HAPPEN”.

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Predicting the UNPREDICTABLE

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How often have you tried to figure out, what next..? what if..?

What’s going to happen in future?

It’s a common question and I think everyone is engulfed with such questions at some point of time. Every human tries to predict about what’s coming ahead, based on situations, based on circumstances & of course, based on experiences.

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It’s always good to plan your future, to look forward for what lies ahead, to be prepared for what you may have to face tomorrow.

But, does the life moves the way we see it? – “NO”, because when we look at future we frame some ‘situation’ on our own & predict all pros & cons revolving around that. But, the thing is that the ‘situation’ itself is “UNPREDICTABLE.”

So, what we thought may not happen at all.

Now, does that mean we shall only dwell in our present & shall not bother about future? – “YES/NO”?

We cannot generalize the question and we cannot generalize the answer. We have to plan certain things. Future planning is necessary to build a steady path & stable life ahead. But, we cannot plan & define everything. So, in this quest of future planning we shall always remember that the world will not move the way we like / we thought it to be. We shall therefore, leave certain things to move the way they are moving.

Water flows at its best without obstructions. If we place our finger in path of flowing water, it swirls here and there. Same goes with life. It’s better to let it move the way it is moving, if we try to intervene it starts taking a haphazard, jumbled shape. Sometimes, we lose focus of our actual target & actual track & keep moving round & round in a confined space exploring different possibilities. At times we may also land up converting a smooth clear path into a complex, puzzled road leaving us lost & confused.

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We shall be ready to accept the fact that we don’t have control over everything and everyday comes with a new beginning, a new challenge, a new change, a new struggle, a new lesson & a new experience. We shall happily welcome these changes & be ready to accept & face whatever lies ahead.

One must always:

“HOPE FOR THE BEST, BUT BE PREPARED FOR THE WORST.”


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Learn to say “NO”

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No, No, No… How can I say “NO”? How can I refuse? How can I deny? How can I raise objection? How can I oppose?

We have different circumstances, different reasons, different places where we feel the urge to say “NO”, but we just cannot.

Starting with office, how difficult it is for you to say “NO” :

– When you have a target in front of you & a team member asks for leave.

– When you are overloaded with work.

– When you are given work that is not supposed to be done by you

– When you are given multiple tasks in parallel.

– When you are asked to do favors that are not recommended professionally.

People avoid saying “NO”, thinking that it will ruin their appraisal & reputation. It’s good to be fair to your job, to have positive attitude towards work but it’s not fair to get yourself exploited.

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Coming on personal front, how difficult it is for you to say “NO” :

– When you have to lend your vehicle at the time when you also need it.

– When you have to lend money for luxuries at time when you need it for your necessities.

– When you go out shopping / watching movie against your will.

– When you are ready to do things against your will just because that is what your family / friends wants you to do.

People avoid saying “NO”, thinking that it may disappoint / hurt the other person. Again, it’s good to be concerned to respect each other’s feelings but not to the extent that it becomes burden / pressure / inconvenience for us.

Saying “NO” is often difficult for some people but they should decide some priorities, maintain some criteria’s, and make some boundaries so that they don’t land up losing their own mental peace.

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And at times not saying “NO” at a proper time may mess up the things to an extent that you have not thought of? People start taking you for granted and then a situation arises that you have no option left except saying “NO”.. but it is not accepted respectfully as it was never expected from you. It vanishes the 10 times when you didn’t said “NO” & ends up creating a question “How dare you say NO”?

Also, there are situations especially in personal matters when one says “YES” to everything out of concern and care, but then if the circumstances does not favor & you are not able to keep up your commitment , you land up disappointing & hurting others. A “NO” at the first instant would have been a better option. It’s better not to commit, unless you are sure you can fulfill it.

Doing more than expectations is always “WELCOME” but doing less than expectations is mostly “CRITICIZED.”

One should always remember:

“WE CANNOT PLEASE EVERYONE.”

Decisions need to be based on the rationality and not merely to please someone, and we need to prioritize !

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